I can't make any post or even write a poem or a quote. I can't open my laptop and last an hour doing whatever in it. I don't know why I'm like this. I just knew that whenever I felt mad at someone or get disappointed for something I will not do anything. I don't have the strength and the will to do a task or anything. This past days , I am very down. MELANCHOLIC !! yah , My Christmas is not that happy. So I can't write post here. I'm sad , yes, very sad ! Hope this feeling go away .. like a song ;
Rain , rain go away .
Come again another day
Little Children want's to play
Rain , rain go away .
Come again another day
Little Children want's to play
So I hope by tomorrow I could write a better post ............................
I remember my peers having problem with this CURFEW hour. That time I never knew what it mean. Is it a special time ? for what ? I asked them about it and they explain it to me very clearly. So here's my own research of it :)
Curfew came from the word covrefeu , an old french word that means cover the fire . Back then people in France set their time on when they will kill the flame of their candles or lamps. They call this time as covrefeu. At the Mid English or called Anglo-Frech they pronounced it as coverfeu . The word evolves as it pass through languages and comes out with the word "CURFEW". This means a regulation or rule requiring a person to be at home at an specific and prescribe time given by the ones who had the authority , maybe parents , officials in town or elders. It may also mean as an order establishing a specific time in the evening after which certain regulations apply, especially that no civilians or other specified group of unauthorized persons may be outdoors or that places of public assembly must be closed. (This was a short research)
Nowadays there are several acts or laws in our country containing rules of curfew. Different places here in our country are consummating this laws. Indeed , this rule will really help the town officials to organize the public places or the city. This regulation should be followed by youth .Well , when we look at it closer it is obviously for teenagers who loves staying outdoors late at night.
My some of friends are like vampires. They love staying outside during night so this is their big problem.
I remembered when they where caught by the barangays who roam around our place at night. Haha they sleep at our Barangay Hall. I guess they learned their lesson by then. Starting that night they never went out when our curfew hour started..
In be half of the million teenagers nowadays my opinion about "Suicide attempts of teenagers"
are to be read here. No offense to other people as well as other concern individuals who would disagree or agree with me. This is my personal opinion/thought regarding this topic.
We are now on the stage of modernization. Too many changes are occurring in our world and at the same time we people too are facing so many problems. As everybody knows problems are not only carried by adults, parents and elders. Conflicts and struggles in life was also seen by young people. The audience or little once are also carrying the burdens. Yah, maybe your children were to young to understand things around him/her, but you never can tell.Nowadays children are better, they are smarter. Their mind are faster and they can catch up very quick. The little boy/girl that you are protecting and isolating from the real world might build his/her own world. You as a parent might cause the abnormalities in him/her emotion. Specially when you already build a barrier for him/her against the society just because your being insensitive. Or maybe you might be too kind to him/her that he/she take's that as an advantage to escape from your house and gone wild at somewhere..These are probably some reason why teenagers messed up and go out of their minds.
Imagine if every 20 min. 1 teen is dying for a none sense reason. What will happen to our world !!
If they are being mislead by adults then what will we expect on the future.
REASONS WHY TEENS COMMITTED SUICIDE :
1. Lack of attention --> Because of the less attention a teen is given , he/she is craving for it. He/she is searching this attention from other people such as boyfriend/girlfriend or in a group of friends that somewhat sooner or later leave her/him hanging and causing him/her to attempt suicide.
2. Depression --> Due to the mixed emotion and frustrations , failures , struggles , and conflicts in teens life depression occur. During this stage a teen's mind is out of control. Her/his thinking is not proper and might cause him/her a great damage.
3. Unsocial --> Being unsocial causes a teen feels that he/she is alone and when you are alone , things or crazy things rather enters your mind. "EMO" thats the best term for it . Lack of social ties are the common cause of this.
4. Pressure --> A teenager is always facing different problems and challenges everyday. Together with these are the pressure that the people around him/her is giving him/her. Upon carrying the responsibilities some might be to pressured and collapsed. They are the ones that tried escaping from the this pressure.
5. Loosing God -> For me this is the number one reason why teens and other people committed suicide. They are not that close to God or living without knowing God . These people Don't have the relationship to the Lord or any religious knowledge and have no activities associated to the churches or religious groups .
Last year I meet this girl, a schoolmate of mine, I found out more about her. She was a blogger , web designer , freelance model and a paid advertiser. I get confused. She really earned money through internet and because of that I adored her much. She became my inspiration to build a blog. Honestly my first intention in blogging was to earn money. Who don't wan't money? Off course I wan't it. Everybody wants it. That's my number one perspective upon writing on my blog. My outlook focuses on how to earn and to find online income. I took time on how to find online jobs. I wasted my hours searching, but don't find any that suits me. Well, I just stopped. Get disappointed. Its not that easy.I just failed and found none. Very ridiculous.
I continued my blog. I write random thoughts and ideas. I put their everything that I want. Without knowing that my blog would expand and would be read by more people around the world. Everyday I am earning knowledge about blogsphere.I discover great blogs that I do always read from then. I also meet people who has wonderful blogs. The coolest is when I have known this Filipino bloggers too .Yah , they really made me envy. I got an idea that someday my blog will be better than theirs.haha !! As I go farther beyond my expectations, blogging has been a part of my daily task. I can't last a day without dropping by my blogs and updating it. I do love blogging so much. I found it very interesting. I can share all what I wanted and give my own opinions. Whats very enjoying here? Its when I posted my poem and get positive comments. It gives me a smile. Whenever someone followed my blog, I get interested to them too and ten followed them as well. I always check my blog status and when I found that I got too many visitors, it makes me smile then.
As I started blogging I knew that I am with a wrong purpose yet I found a deeper meaning of it in myself. During my first 4 months of being a blogger, I can't tell that I wrote very interesting and useful articles or post but by being a blogger I expresses my feelings and opinion. It was really fun. Am I being redundant of it?never mind. I always wanted to see myself blogging different unique topics and an eye catching articles for readers. I dream of being a better blogger than I AM.Filipino bloggers are my inspirations. I now set aside money and write for my own happiness. Even if I still hope for online income, it is not my number one reason now. So , is blogging fun ?? Yes , absolutely. I could proudly say that I AM A HAPPY BLOGGER :)
I am so eager to learn more about this world wide web and explore different things within this circle, but as I go deeper exploration I found so many things which caught my attention. These things really hangs me. They disturbed my mind always . So one by one I wanted to learn them all. I wanted to discover more about them and my first task is to know more about web designing . Web designing is a very interesting for me. The templates of other bloggers really made me insecure ( haha ) I always wanted to have and build my own design . But I know that was too far for me to grasp. Now , I decided to start learning this. I am watching videos on youtube. By the way watching tutorials via youtube is what I prefer most , I'm not that good reader and I just get drowsy whenever the article or info's don't enter my mind. As what I have said , I have started watching videos and these videos really do help me. Very awesome!! Well I am just starting , watch out for my own design .. haha ( if I could do one ). Hope I can !!
Is this the world of human being ?
a world that is always pretending
Is this the only planet with life ?
Yes ! this is the planet of strife.
A big circle of frustrations,
A huge compartment of possession.
Luxurious beings lived within
Living their life alone with scheme.
This is the world of sinners
no saints , no greek gods but liers ,
Yes, this is the world of the human.
A cruel and sarcastic world of man.
Oh what a pathetic world I have been
I can't hold but scream
I can't believe what I have seen
I tried describing these by words,
but this is an unpredictable world
and I'm alone to do these works.
Since I love spoiling you guys, I’m throwing a 3 part Christmas giveaway + a birthday giveaway (I’m turning 19 on December 23) this holiday season! :) Here are the stuff you can win for Part 1 (thank you so much to these stores for sponsoring the prizes):
Taking so much time researching and surfing the net. was too hard for me just to find online jobs that suits in me. I'm just fun of finding online jobs that will be a source of my income. At first it was just for fun to look for jobs online, but as I go deeper researching, I found that real money can also be earned through internet. I get curious about this jobs. I just wander , why do other people work so hard? they almost die working and turning their nights into days. While some people just sit down, face the computer and do some hand exercises and tada! money will just fly into their cards.
--- to be continued ..
antok nako ... asar ! by the way this is done na naman in my scratch :))
--- This is a poem I made for my BESTFRIEND . Her father just past away this Saturday . I can feel the pain that she's feeling right now, but it's the fact that we needed to accept that life has to end.
Keep on asking questions ?
tired of all frustrations ?
have you search or solutions ?
or solve the equations ?
No, you just guess the conclusion !!
Have you made any action ?
or move to change the motion ?
No, you just sit and made prediction !!
Debris of the past piled up,
pieces of the glass where wrapped .
Broken mirrors unfixed,
melancholic life it is.
Mournful souls awake,
happiness and gay it take.
Sleeping sorrows scattered,
entered the hearts of the bothered .
Step out of the box,
go get that golden ax .
work , start to carve
feel bless of what you have.
Nov. 15 ,2011 . It was a heavy day for me . I'm so busy doing school activities and it actually like kill me
( huh exaggerated ) But I have something to laugh or to be annoy either about this day .
I wanted to share this foolish moments of mine :))
It was a tiring day as what I said . While I'm on my way home from our school with my 2 classmates ,
we passed through a vendor of random things. ( Here in the Phil. there was many vendors which uses the
trick of luck, I mean the lucky people should only win it. It goes like there was a paper with nothing and its where will you choose from it, and when you dropped it in the water, a number or a letter sometimes shapes
will appear. If your lucky and guessed what the content of the paper, you absolutely won a prize ).
Hmm guess what I did. I go back and pick a paper there . 1 piece of paper and a guess cost 5 php. .
First try was a failure. 2nd try was a foolish one . then the 3rd, 4th, 5th try was a d*mn !! I didn't got at least 1 correct guess !! grrrrr..... 1 spent my 50 php just for nothing . It was very disgusting ! The money that I lost was my last budget that day . My wallet cry out. agrrrrrr !!!!
So that's all . That's the day when I lost my mind and left it on somewhere . haha..
LESSON : don't ever trust the luck ! It MIGHT NOT COME . YOU MIGHT LOOSE ! hehehe ..
This day was quite a lonely one for me. hhmm what was wrong ?? Longing for someone ?? or just missing every one . Who am I pertaining to ? Okay, today lets talk about my friends. My ever loyal , supportive and crazy friends ever . The people who was destined to cross the path which I'm taking and join me for a walk. The people who shed tears and laughter's with me . How I wish we could be at one road for a lifetime. How I wish to spend the everyday with them to fill it wit happiness. Oh ! they are worth missing and looking for ....
Friends ?? someone you can lean on . Someone you can cry on . Someone you can open your heart too. Someone who knows you inside out . Some who lends a helping hand. There are so much definition for a friend . So much adjectives to describe he/she. But don't you ever wonder why friend is there . Why the word friend exist ?? I can say that it has a connection in the phrases "each man is not an island" and " everyone of us have responsibilities/obligation " . Being a friend is just simply loving someone. A special love that we can give to others without malice. Being a friend is an honor . There are no bad and good friends or called BI ( bad influence ) and GI ( good influence ). It is actually a choice for us what path we will take .
For now , I just misses my old friends. I misses the moments and memories . I'm longing for them too much . Missing the times we raised shot glasses and ate junk foods. Share plates and drinks. Toast for a beer. Share problems and depressions. Wen't to the guidance office together. Made crime together .. I'm searching for the comfort that we gave to each other .The memories of the friendship is indeed a treasure to keep. The friends I met and have bond too is stock here in my heart . I will all keep them and never ever forgot them.
Its time to be back in reality. Its time to accept the fact that everything changes. The time , the day and people are not the same anymore. I have to accept that these people that I called friends only join me for a walk . A walk that will end soon when we get to another crossing. We have to walk in separates ways. Departing time had come.
Lets talk about our society! what a about it ? what about our environment and the atmosphere ? We can all be blind by it. We can all be numb of it.We can all just past by the street and neglect the pathetic children or just be so cruel to earn much money while others have none either.It's just a thought in my mind that leads me here. Being expose to the real world was quite disgusting for a teen. It annoys whenever I see the dark part of the earth. Deep frustration, burdens and possessions are too hard to understand. Some are beyond my knowledge and even if how I hard I tried to understand it , still I can't . Back when I was younger than I was now, I remember playing around. Nothing to worry about. In my mind was a world so wonderful, colorful and beautiful . But what was I don\'t know is that this world is above and beyond my imagination.
I was just an ordinary student. Non-powered and simple. I am not In the place to command. What I know that I have the right to speak , to share my ideas and expose my opinions. I am not a perfect citizen of my country nor a good Samaritan. I am but a teenager, who have the desire and hope that our world will be changed to a better one. Hoping that one day all the people will come as one, with one heart and one goal and that goal would aim to break the barriers that each continent, country , cities , and humans made.
Wars , conflicts , distraction and struggles around the globe. Differences , frustrations , obsessions , selfishness cause it all. Bombings , airstrikes and terrorist attacks , what a frightening situations. Never in my mind to wish encountering one of these. One by one we will all die. Die for a nonsense reason . Die from the hand of our fellow countrymen. Die for a reason we don't really understand. Die in a war which no one knows when it did started or even why was it started. I don't wanna see my relatives and love one's on the news dying . I don\'t wanna stand without doing . I love this world . God had given this to us to protect and not to ruin. God had given us to took care of this and not to worn it out. God had failed trusting us. God had failed giving us the obligation . Us citizen of this world are just controlled by our damn emotions. We never think of our fellow people. We tried to escape the reality, hide from the society. We won\'t accept truths, we just believes on our own lies...
Waking up is the only key. To open again the close doors. W shall not wait for the act of God.You and me should not be afraid of one's shadow. We should work out peace against the time... I have but a single step. You too had it. Every one had a single chance. Lets not waste it . STOP THE WAR AND MAKE PEACE. A phrase that continues live but never we did. How could I accomplish this? if I'm doing it without the help of you my dear. Let's all together wake up our souls. All together make one goal. LOVE and FAITH is the secret weapon. Made a little step towards the better future.
Did you enjoy your Halloween ? hmm what costume did you worn ? How many treats do you got and earned ???
Asking me ? I absolutely enjoy my Halloween . Regularly my halloween is just spending this day as usual . Nothing is new . All are just repeated actions of yesterday . But this last Halloween , I can say that it was not an ordinary day . Hmm If I am correct this is the first time I enjoyed the Halloween . yah , I enoyed my halloween , HOW ?? continue reading :))
The photo above was a picture of my niece and nephews . Guess who ruined their faces ?? haha its none other than ME . Your right , I just started my career as make-up artist :)) MAKE-UP ARTIST OF THE DEAD .While I'm watching a horror movie. They knock on our door and ask me to dress them up for this halloween . I got a bright idea ! I immediately went to my closet and find worn out clothes there . I get it to serve as there costume . I had a lot of fun painting there faces . I keep on laughing while doing it . They are cool , they calmly cooperate without any hesitation . I feel so glad . hahaha can't hold but laugh out loud . I get some " HARINA" and mix it with face powder . I got my lipstick and eyeliner on the side. It just last 5 mins. to dress them one by one . Feeling like a stylist ha !
After I finish putting them make-ups, We roam around our area . They knock on each neighbors door and TADA !! TRICK OR TREAT :)) We walk don the street and all eyes are looking at them . Although there are other children that was in costumes too , still the gossips stared at my children . Haha what a funny experience . I am the manager of my little kids . I hold the candies and the money that people gave . What am I doing? I am eating the candies while we are walking without their knowledge c(: !! The kids are having fun to . They keep on running and running to somewhere . They are also enjoying what we are doing .
We earn a lot of candies and money . We are all tired even if we just walk for almost 1 hour and half . I divided the treats to them and sad part , I don't get some :(( HUH .. UNFAIR !!
The most powerful in this world,
given by God for us to know its worth.
There is no difficulties that it can't conquer,
there is no questions that it can't answer.
There is no disease that it can't heal,
there is no hatred that it can't kill.
No stoned heart that it can't soften,
no closed doors that it can't open.
Even how hopeless the outlook
though you're tapped in a dark nook.
a great realization should occr,
that loving enough is humans nature.
For there is enough love that solve,
chaos and havoc, it will all dissolve.
if only we could give enough love ..
Once in my life
darkness filled me up.
Loneliness has carve
into my my tired heart .
Too many times I had been broken
so many times been fixed,
but then ripped me again .
You are all so blind.
My burdens were bind.
Behind the cloud where I see the light,
still here contented seeing it.
Never to aim holding it.
Afraid of falling,
afraid of being crushed.
Regrets holds me back,
Memories pushes me down.
I just stay here.
Stay broken and unfixed.
just here contented ,
with my wounds that will never heal .
AT AN AGE OF A TEEN .
is it normal to feel this love ?? Because as of now I could gradually say that I am DEEPLY IN LOVE with my boy :)) I can't do anything but to burst it out . All the things I am seeing was too coherent with him . How tremendous feeling I always felt when I'm with him >.< Ridiculous me ! But I can't hide it . I am truly in loved :))
I feel complete . how spontaneous I am when I'm with him . Getting crazier each of the moment that past . I had admired all of his capabilities as well as his abilities . His smile and mysterious personality . How I loved his arrive !!!
I am happy, contented , and I feel safe while I'm with him. His splendid personality fits my crazy like's and hates .
What is a decision ?? Based on the dictionary it was an act of deciding or a judgement . But for you guys , what do think this word means ? If you will ask me , my answer will be this:
For me DECISION is simply choosing !! Choosing where you will go . What path will you take and whom will be your companions . Making decision is not that easy. Me, as I made decisions, I always prepare myself for its consequences . Its because I know that in every action / decision there was an opposite reaction or consequences. Just like what Isaac Newton's Theory of opposite and equal reaction. As early as a kiddo we should be preparing in how to decide for our selves. It is not all the time that our parents will be there to choose what would be the best for us. We should be independent in our simple ways. Yes! deciding is hard when it comes to delicate matters, such as love life, family problems or other deeper one involving difficult things .. I have decided too many times in my life, and as I have done. I admit that there are decisions were I failed. There are some decisions where I lost, and some is where I learned. I failed . Yes. I remember when I
decided not taking my MATH subject seriously. My drowsiness attacks whenever our subject teacher in math enters the room. How irresponsible I am :)) I choose to be it and at the end of grading, I harvested low grade.... Its my karma. A consequence of my decision . No hard feelings to my teacher, I calmly accepted what I planted. And I learn from it. I promised to work for my subject for the sake of my grades.... I ave a goal. And at the end of the school year. I reached that goal. I earned my grades. A high grade :))
I wrote about this topic because of a friend . A dear friend of mine who had failed in deciding about love. She had a long distance relationship, but she get tired of it. Another boy entered his life. She needs to choose whom will stay and whom will go.. First guy loved her too much but distance is there. Second guy had feelings for her and always besides her. She decided to choose the second guy. They last for 3 MONTHS.. But then after this time scale, the guy had another girl. Another girl who he thinks surpass my friend. The guy broke up with her. My friend end up crying :(( . Yes I was there. I knew it will happen. But the decision is not on my hands. I let my friend choose. I supported her. But then again, some decisions are made to fail and to learn from them . I just stood beside her and said " YOU WERE ONCE HAPPY IN THIS DECISION, FOR CHOOSING THAT GUY. YOU ONCE ENJOYED HIS COMPANY. NOW THAT YOU FAiLED... ACCEPT WITH NO REGRET ".
We are not perfect beings. We have faults. Right and wrongs. In our every decision, we must take consequences. Life is a game of deciding, of choosing. Even if we took practices and try to master the ability in how to perfect a decision making, our destiny are not on our hands. Still GOD plans our path . But we can change it by doing good decisions .
Do you know whats the worst thing i have done this day ?????
----- Its when I deleted my First Ever, seriously made and with full effort typed article ......
My continuation of my blog " CHILDHOOD DAYS " , have deleted it.
grrrrrrrr...... My mind will boost. I give 1 hour writing that article then in just one click I lost it all :/
Its what i hate in typing.... I always do forgot saving an important article before I do necessary thing ..
hmmmm... how will i brought back that one.. huhu .. I am very dis appointed. I have no courage to write for today. I will just sleep and tomorrow I will write another one.( I hope I could )
Years just past by in a glance. Hours seems like a second. Days are like hours. It seems like yesterday I was just a kid. Playing with other children. Innocent and pure. I can still remember my childhood days. When all was too easy for me. When I knew no problem at all. When life seems to be a big game and I will play it fare and square. When the world seems too big in my eyes and the right and wrong are not that clear. The toys are just around . And my laughter just fill my parents day. When I woke up until I sleep at night , all their eyes are on me. I got to much attention and feel so love at all. I reminisce all the memories when I felt down. It made me smile a little. When I giggle and roll all around, people around me will laugh. My little works made them happy. In my number of words, they gave too many meanings. I guess I misses all these things.
Back when I was a kid, I remember crying for some candies, junk foods and chocolates. I absolutely love sweets. Thats why when I grew a bit older ( 8 or 9 ) my teeth are damage.They are not that good to look at :( .I do brush my teeth everyday but still I can't make my teeth beautiful :) . As a child I keep wondering why......When the time comes that I understand why is it like that, a thought comes to my mind. CHOCOLATES, CHOCOLATES..its the cause why my teeth is damage!!! hmmmmmm... Will i stop eating chocolate ?? NO I WON'T :). I still eat too much chocolates. Its the time that I don't stop brushing my teeth everyday. I don't skip even 1 moment trice a day brushing my teeth. And when my milk teeth were gone. And my permanent teeth starts growing I slowdown eating sweets.
Now I just can't stop this addiction in sweets. When I'm happy I eat chocolate. Specially when I'm down. I eat chocolate. As far as I know scientist proven that it can lessen bad vibrations because it contains something ( oh! i don't know what it is .) For me its one way of escaping from reality to a peaceful world. I found silence when I eat chocolates , specially when dark choco's.Oh! I love it. Now that I am a teen and I care too much for the so called outer appearance I took good care of my teeth , but I won't stop my habit. I won't ever stop eating choco's :))
A fancy stuff. A cute little kitty. At first I don't mind her. But one time when I was alone, when it seems that the world fell in front of me, I saw Hello Kitty in a corner of my room. Looks like she's staring at me !! She doesn't have the lips to smile or to frown even. I guess she has that POKER FACE. But no! because her eyes speaks. I don't know what crazy thing comes to my mind when I picked up this stuff and hug it tight.I felt comforted and loved. Since then I started loving her. Whenever or where ever I saw Hello Kitty, I can't stop smiling. Now I admit that I am a HELLO KiTTY FANATiC :))